I’m going to be right up front with it: TV doesn’t suck.
I have a pet peeve that is giving me grief lately, and that’s that so many people are so high and mighty in the way that they say: “Oh, I don’t watch TV, it isn’t worth my time.” And it seems the intention is to make someone like me, who does watch TV, feel insignificant and stupid. Shall we check to see if that is indeed the case? Does Mel feel insignificant and stupid?
… … …
Yes, Mel feels insignificant and stupid, but not because she watches TV.
Seriously. If I were to make a list of all the things in the world that aren’t worth my time, well — golly. The thing is, sweeping generalizations like that brass me off, for a number of reasons. Prepare yourself, folks, because Mel is going to vent.
Yes, there is a lot of programming on TV that sucks rocks. Is this shocking to anyone? (Tangent: The other night at a dinner I used the word “suck” with a little too much emphasis in front of a 4-year-old; that was embarrassing, to say the least.) But then let me pose a question: For every good book out there, aren’t there something like 85,000* out there that blow chunks? I read somewhere once that upwards of 600 – 700 feature films are made each year. Do we ever hear about more than 15 – 20 % of those while they’re in the theatre? No. Why? Because a lot of them are bad. And even some of the bad ones get more press — and ticket sales — than the good ones.
Now, let’s be clear. I’m not a fan of reality TV; I cringe whenever I recall that there are whole channels devoted to putting narrative writers out of work. Whoever the genius is at NBC that thought it would be a good idea to cancel the whole week of prime prime-time in favor of the Jay Leno hour is not a genius. Cartoons aren’t what they used to be; neither are sitcoms, for that matter. I know all of this. Does that mean that TV sucks? NO. It means that some of the stuff on TV sucks. There is a big difference, peeps. “Is Mel arguing semantics?” you may ask. I say, “Of course.” People forget that words have meaning. They have weight. You don’t have to be a writer to know that saying one thing does not always mean you are saying another. Fancy that! Talking to people is not like talking to your boyfriend — It helps if you’re not cryptic and insane. Say what you mean.
Now, if you actually mean that TV is not worth your time… It’s very possible that you are the saintly sort who spends their summer holidays caring for orphans in Sarajevo. If this is you, I applaud you; I am not worthy of admiring you, let alone dissing how you discuss your free time. However, you that are that saintly sort — You are like excellent books, film, and TV; you are that rare example of what is good in the world.
I will bear witness to the fact that there is such a thing as fantastic TV. Pushing Daisies, anyone? 30 Rock. Mad Men. I’m personally not a fan of The Sopranos, but I can appreciate the effort and artistry that went into every episode. A lot of people like Lost, and there’s a lot about Lost to like. Firefly was a fantastic show. The West Wing was idealistic, yes, but totally committed to being so; and the acting was stellar. Battlestar Galactica is some of the best sci-fi ever because the dramatic point wasn’t that the show was sci-fi; the point was that the characters were human.
Lately I’ve been into The Good Wife, Castle, and Glee. Are any of these shows perfect? No. But they have moments that are too die for; moments that I’m glad I’ve seen because they do what art does — they make me think. As an audience member, I look for those moments in everything: those instances that make me a better writer, a better artist, and a better person. Am I being grandiose in assuming an hour of TV can make you a better person? Probably. But that is why I watch. I would be a liar if I said otherwise, since I think the same thing whenever I go to a film or a play or an art show: Good art makes you a better person. That’s the truth. That’s the core of everything. Which brings me to this simple point: Good TV is art. Plain and simple.
I want to be a better person; I know I need to be a better person. Is that an idealistic world view? Yes. What’s wrong with that? This cynic believes this cynical world and its penchant for sarcasm and darkness could use a little idealism.
Now, it’s true TV has brain-sucking capabilities (thanks for pointing that out, Hulu) but like anything that is available in vast amounts, proper consumption requires moderation. I’m not saying we should all just sit at home all day and watch TV and hope for a shining moment of goodness to sneak up and bop us on the head. I’m saying don’t write off the medium. If you choose not to watch TV, that is fine, you have that right; good on you. But don’t you dare judge me if I choose to partake, because you can’t win the argument that “TV is worthless.” Judge me off of something you can argue: that I drink too much sugar, that left-handed people are more likely to be insane, that I need to work on my penmanship, that I can be rude and selfish and not a good person. But see how those are all specific flaws and not blanket generalizations? Excellent.
That is all. Now proceeding to step off the soap box. Moving on…
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*Not an actual statistic. I’m a dramatist, folks; I make this stuff up. But it sounded dramatic, didn’t it? “85,000.” Just has a nice authoritative tone.



